Sunday, August 09, 2009

A doorway into thanks

For terns and their fast wings
and the silvery fish that vanish beneath them.

For the little that I have
and less now, even, that you left me with.

For the oddly striped and sunblocked
and our ritual weekend-wash in the sea.

For my books
and your eye that didn't discern their value.

For this memoried vessel
and its wealth of beauty in bloom.

It draws my eye from what's been broken and dusted over;
a greasy black powder to name my fear.


For the comfort of neighbors
and the part of me, despite this, that wants to feel ok here.

For the perfect pink end to this day
and its voices that animate the darkest corners of my heart.

For your lack of any real malice
and the small brown bunny left in peace to be a witness.

For all the familiar things that mock me, unseen
and the Kingbird's solemn regard.

For having no one, really, to run to
and surviving, anyway, this first of disasters.

*This post was created on a Mac!... the only happy result of my laptop and most all of my camera gear being stolen early this week. I'm working my way through being angry... and trying to find that thankful place in my heart again.

19 comments:

RG said...

Holy smoke ... insurance? Hope so .. that's like stealing a ballerina's shoes!

We were robbed twice .. most terrible feeling I ever remember. Onece was at night when people broke into the garage. The next night I sat out in the shadows for a long time with a baseball bat, hoping they would come back!

Heck ... somebody stole a license plate off our car once ... while we were visiting Canada.

Spooky.

Hope you recover ...

bobbie said...

Laura, I'm so sorry. I can imagine the anger you feel.

Jayne said...

Oh Laura... I am so sorry. I can only imagine what a gut punch that must have been.

Forest Green said...

So very sad to hear your news. Please know that you are in our thoughts and prayers. It's a horrible feeling to have. I hope that it is offset by the knowledge that there are many, many people that love you ...

Susan Gets Native said...

Still wanting to beat up the thugs for you...
...but loving that spunk and sweetness in your heart that no one could ever steal away.
Hugs.

Patrick B. said...

Wow, that's some sucky news right there. Beautiful writing though.

Carolyn H said...

Laura,

i'm so sorry to hear about the theft. I don't think I'd be able to get past the anger too quickly. You sound as though you're doing better at that than I could. Take care.

Carolyn h.

robin andrea said...

This is such a beautiful, touching poem. I would like to copy it for my brother who had a similar experience very recently. The balance in your words knows both what was taken and what was left behind.

Webtoad said...

I love how you distilled your hurt & anger, and, amazingly, your thankfulness for all you still have, into this poem.

KGMom said...

I started reading your post, thinking--hmmm, wonder what poet Laura is using here (as you do sometimes when you skilfully blend image and word).
And then I get to the end--you are the poet. And the precipitant of your words is a violation of your abode.
You take my breath away.
And I am sending protective thoughts your way--and to the brown bunny as well.

Anonymous said...

Sorry to hear about the theft, Laura. I know that like me, your camera is an extension of your arm.

You will enjoy your Mac, for sure.

MevetS said...

HFS!

Not quite the same, but I had a car stolen while on business in Rhode Island, after a week of camping in the Berkshires. The anger I felt towards the people who did this, not just for the theft but for the disruption of my life. I would of written a much different poem.

The key difference, to me anyway, is the sense of violation when it is your home. So how are you doing?

On that same trip I spent a night in jail. The bed was very hard. And they made sure that I had no shoelaces, so as not to hang myself.

Rhode Island is an evil, evil place.

And I echo the sediments about your post. Very well written, and all the more so considering the circumstances.

And when we go wandering in he Pines I'll lend you my camera.

ReluctantChickenFarmer said...

"For having no one, really, to run to
and surviving, anyway, this first of disasters."

Ahem.

Lynne at Hasty Brook said...

Sending a big squishy hug your way- even if you're not a hugger!

936000 said...

My heart just sank in my chest when I read your post. All the cliche responses run through my head but I can't seem to think of anything to say that would be truly uplifting or to "make it all better." I am so sorry you had to experience this and hoping each day gets better (and take your time getting through *all* the emotions).

Anonymous said...

For your bunny and your books and your brother close by . . .

I hope your sweet spirit remains intact. So sorry to hear about this violation of your home.

Luka okay?

Heather
Wayne, PA

-- word verification: "extorymo" -- sounds like a spell that Harry Potter would use on the #@*& thieves.

Caroline said...

You turned something ugly into a thing of beauty of the spirit.
Peace be with you...

NCmountainwoman said...

You are one gracious woman! What a terrific attitude and a moving poem. There is at least some comfort in the fact that the idiots wanted only electronic items for a quick sale and did not destroy items that mean so much to you.

My heart goes out to you. I know that despite your great attitude, some feeling of violation remains and for that I am truly sorry.

LauraHinNJ said...

Thanks everybody... mostly I'm still in one piece.

:-)